The Karate Kid: Movies (1984-94)

The Karate Kid: Movies (1984-94)

Dirs. John G. Avildsen (Movies #01-03) / Christopher Cain (Movie #04)

01. The Karate Kid (1984). After moving to California with his mom, Daniel LaRusso (Ralph Macchio) quickly makes an enemy of a clichéd high school bully. Both parties have an interest in karate, which adds flavour to what's on the surface a straightforward 80s underdog story.

There are teenager levels of romance to contend with, but it's illustrated with the best intentions, so it's not as forced as it could've been.

The real treasure is the believable sincerity that characterises the relationship that Mr Miyagi (Pat Morita) has both with the eager-to-learn Daniel and the wider world, as a whole.

Morita's understated performance keeps Miyagi as a supporting character while simultaneously elevating him to become the true emotional core of the story. With a single wordless glance he can communicate a whole chapter's worth of feelings. He embodies what belief, patience, wisdom, and sensitivity can accomplish when each element achieves balance.

Kids Return (1996)

Kids Return (1996)

Dir. Takeshi Kitano

Told mostly in flashback, it's the story of two high school friends, Shinji and Masaru (Masanobu Andô and Ken Kaneko, respectively), who occasionally go to school but spend very little time in actual class.

The tutors have given up on them, seeing them as either directionless morons or little more than petty thieves in training. In time, the duo would probably agree... but a single event gives perspective that leads to insight.

Often in Kitano films the secondary characters are just as interesting as the primaries, but in Kids Return some of the lesser characters actually stole the show, being arguably even more interesting than the two main ones and I'd love to have seen their sub-stories expanded and further explored.

Oddly, even though it's but a tiny portion of the film insofar as the total running time goes, I was affected more by the scenes set in the present than in flashback.

King Kong: The De Laurentiis Movies (1976–86)

King Kong (1976)

Dir. John Guillermin

The biggest difference between the original 1933 version and the 70s remake is that the latter movie is full colour. It wasn't the first Kong movie to use colour film stock, but it was the first English language one to do so.

The second major difference is that Kong is now a human actor in an ape suit, whereas previously he was a model that had been brought to life by the magic of stop motion animation. It seems as if Hollywood were taking cues from Japan, specifically Toho, who had used the King Kong character in their Godzilla franchise over a decade previously.

Likewise, the impressive scale model landscapes used in the Hollywood version seem to be inspired by Japan's movies. [1]

King Kong: The Toho Movies (1962–67)

King Kong vs. Godzilla (1962)

Dir. Ishirō Honda

I reviewed KKvG in my Godzilla: Shōwa Era Films (1954-74) post, but it was from a 'Godzilla movie' perspective, not a King Kong one. Logic says I should re-watch it from a Kong perspective, but I vowed never to suffer its woeful story ever again, so I've simply copy/pasted from the previous post, with some minor editing. I don't think my overall opinion would've changed much, anyhow.

The most positive thing that I can muster to say about KKvG is that it's the first King Kong movie to be shot in full widescreen and on colour stock. It's pretty terrible otherwise.

Fans who only want a monster bash will have to wait an hour before the two titans even meet, and when it happens it's laughable.

King Kong: The RKO Movies (1933)

King Kong (1933)

Dirs. Merian C. Cooper + Ernest B. Schoedsack

Given the film's revered status among film historians, and that it's considered an inspirational milestone in the evolution of special effects, it's not unreasonable for a modern viewer to expect to be wowed at every turn when viewing KK for the first time.

But it's worth keeping in mind that it was made in 1933 and much of the budget went on the aforementioned effects, so there's a lot of less than stellar moments in-between.

Having said that, when the gargantuan Kong does appear, which is about 47 mins into the 104 mins run time, it should be easy to see why it achieved what it did, doubly so if you feel, as I do, that stop motion animation has a sense of wonder and magic that CGI lacks.

Kamen Rider Black Sun (2022)

Kamen Rider Black Sun (2022)

Dir: Kazuya Shiraishi | Script: Izumi Takahashi | 10 episodes, approx 44 mins each.

Until viewing Black Sun, the most recent Kamen Rider series that I'd watched in its entirety was the fruit-themed Gaim (2013-14), so if there's been a natural progression in how the franchise does things in the intervening years, from a production standpoint, specifically, I'm not aware of it.

Timed to coincide with Rider's 50th anniversary, Black Sun feels different because it's aimed toward an adult audience. The bright 'toy line' colours that usually adorn a Rider's suit are absent, replaced with nondescript shades of black.

Besides the longer running time per episode, there's also scenes of drug use and an elevated level of violence, including immolation, decapitation, severed limbs, etc, some of which is even perpetrated by and against children.

King Diamond: Abigail (2022)

King Diamond: Abigail (2022)

Author: Dan Watters | Illustrator: Damien Worm | Page Count: 120

'Perhaps it was the reduction of the world to simplistic concepts of good and evil that revolted me.'

A comic book adaptation of Danish artist King Diamond's 1987 concept album of the same name, about a couple who inherit a mansion with ghosts, wherein the influence of a stillborn child lingers, having outlived her flesh.

Sadly, there's nothing inside the covers to say how much input King actually had in its creation. Hopefully it was more than a simple nod of the head in agreement to the project being undertaken by someone else.

The credited author is Dan Watters, a British writer with various video game adaptations on his CV and the man who was chosen to helm the relaunch of DC/Vertigo's Lucifer series. All things considered, he did a fine job keeping it respectful while filling in the story's gaps.

Stephen King's Kingdom Hospital (2004)

Stephen King's Kingdom Hospital (2004)

aka Kingdom Hospital
Dir. Craig R. Baxley | 13 episodes, approx 40 mins each (01 and 13 are double length).

American horror author Stephen King took Danish film-maker Lars von Trier's eight episode miniseries, known originally as Riget (1994), and turned it into a thirteen episode English language series, relocated from Copenhagen to Lewiston, Maine (naturally).

There are probably many more changes, but I've not seen the original, so I can't say what they might be.

Von Trier shares an executive producer credit, suggesting he was agreeable to the adaptation, or at the very least happy to whore the concept out.

Peter Rickman (Jack Coleman), the person that we'd traditionally most readily identify as the main protagonist, is admitted to the titular hospital after a serious accident. An accident, incidentally, that mimics King's own hospitalisation almost verbatim; although I suspect the talking anteater is a fiction.

The King of Texas (2002)

The King of Texas (2002)

Dir. Uli Edel

Inspired by Shakespeare's King Lear (c.1603-06) but transposed to the US State and set in the year 1842. It's not entirely faithful to the play, and the language is modernised, but it'll be instantly recognisable to anyone familiar with the text.

Patrick Stewart leads the cast as John Lear, a cattle baron with 200,000 acres of land, an ornery disposition, and three daughters. When he makes the decision to divide his substantial holdings between them, he discovers their true character.

The acting is decent, considering it's a TV Movie, but Patrick's British accent is never far from the surface, which is distracting, given that he's supposed to be pure Texan, so much so that in the early parts of the movie it felt more like he was Captain Picard LARPing on the holodeck - a feeling that was compounded by the appearance of Colm Meaney (Miles O'Brien) portraying the Duke of Albany. If you're not a Star Trek TNG fan, you might find it easier to adjust than I did.

Kiki's Delivery Service (1989)

Kiki's Delivery Service (1989)

Dir. Hayao Miyazaki

Tradition dictates that at age thirteen a young witch should leave her home behind, in order to continue her training elsewhere.

For Kiki, it's an adventure that ends up being equal parts hard work; but she's headstrong when necessary, and with the help of her friend Jiji (a cat), she strives to make her mark.

With delicate pacing and timely underpinning it teaches us that each person has a purpose, even if they aren't aware of it or don't consider what they do to be anything special. 

If you dare to rise to a challenge, do your best for yourself and for others, like Kiki, then the rewards can more than equal the effort put in.

It's not action-packed and doesn't need a dramatic setting to be appreciated (you can watch it on a sunny day), but it's refreshingly sincere, and the attention to detail in environments is noteworthy, making the houses feel lived-in, which gives them a beauty all of their own.

There's a scene during the closing credits, so don't turn off too soon, if you want to see it.

Knights of God (1987)

Knights of God (1987)

13 episodes, approx 26 minutes each.

Dirs. Andrew Morgan (7 eps) and Michael Kerrigan (6 eps)

The fists and crossed swords symbol used by the Knights is a simple but striking and highly evocative design, wordlessly communicating to a viewer that the guiding credo of the order isn't benevolent preservation or protection, it's one of militaristic strength and aggression nestled within the colours that are historically associated with fascism.

In post-civil war Britain (the year 2020 AD) the self-proclaimed Knights rule with force, guns and border patrols, killing any who dare resist their control. It's a children's TV show but the killing doesn't happen off-screen. There's more hard-hitting acts of violence shown than you'd expect to see in a production with such a classification.

In today's culturally sensitive climate it would probably be either heavily cut or labelled as YA.

Killdozer (1974)

Killdozer (1974)

Dir. Jerry London

On a remote beach near the coast of Africa six men clear a site in preparation for an airstrip build, but then cheapo FX = "funny looking rock" = Killdozer!

It's so damned stupid. The machine's top speed is, I don't know, about 12 kmph? A lame duck could outrun it, but still it manages to catch up to, and mow over, some manly men. It bides its time until the men are off guard. It then thunders trundles into the camp, belching black smoke as it goes, kills and retreats to hide in the grass. It's over twenty feet long, bright yellow and it hides in tall grass! Jebus!

Nevertheless, amazingly, it's not as bad as the name implies and I was genuinely entertained by it all. The characters are stock types, like a poor man's disaster movie, but the acting is better than a lot of the crap horror films that I've turned off in my time.

K-9 and Company: A Girl's Best Friend (1981)

K-9 and Company:
A Girl's Best Friend (1981)

Dir. John Black | 50 mins approx.

The fourth Doctor's (Tom Baker) robotic pooch K9 (Mark III) got itself a pilot episode for an offshoot TV series that didn't get green-lit. It's similar to the parent show, but there are no aliens or reckless jaunts through time. That doesn't mean all is rosy and safe, however. Instead, it has a coven of Hecate worshippers that are planning something nefarious in the pastoral English countryside.

Despite not having her name in the title, the real star of the show is Elisabeth Sladen as the forthright, journalistic-minded Sarah Jane Smith.

The title implies that K-9 would've been constant, but would the 'company' have been changeable? Were more cameos planed for future episodes?

I don't know, but I know that it wasn't the final TV offshoot for either of the two main protagonists.

Kinvig (1981)

Kinvig (1981)

Dir. Les Chatfield | 7 episodes, approx 25 mins each.

I expected more from Kinvig, given that it's written by Nigel Kneale, the creator and author of the Quatermass films, but, sadly, it's a weak sci-fi comedy with mostly forgettable characters.

The titular Kinvig (Tony Haygarth) is owner of a corner repair shop in a typical British town. A man with a self-proclaimed "flair" for fixing things, he is in fact a lazy and largely useless sod who wings it most of the time. His life is unstimulating and routine, and because his shop doesn't generate much income he struggles to pay the rates.

Kinvig's best friend is Jim Piper (Colin Jeavons), a man with an unhealthy interest in aliens and unexplained phenomena. If Jim dropped his toast and it landed butter side up, he'd probably think it was the work of extra-terrestrials. But in Kinvig's life Jim is the foremost authority on such things.

The Hood Trilogy (2006-16)

KiDULTHOOD (2006)

Dir. Menhaj Huda

A hard-hitting drama set in the suburbs of west London exploring what daily life is like for a small number of teenagers in mid-2000s era Britain, most of whom are approximately fifteen-years-old. Many folks, especially parents, will be offended or even outraged by the use of language, violence, drugs and sex in the film, but that doesn't mean it isn't an accurate reflection of what's actually happening on the streets outside their front door.

The activities and friends are spread out over a small area and a few short days, culminating in the kind of unsupervised teenage house-party that rarely goes off without a hitch.

For at least two of the youths it's a build-up and event that's nothing short of life-changing, in the most unforgettable ways.

Knightmare (1987–94)

Knightmare (1987–94)

8 Seasons, 112 episodes, approx 25 mins each.

As a young Faustus I loved all things fantasy and supernatural: HeroQuest gaming sessions; Steve Jackson and Ian Livingstone's Fighting Fantasy books; the many Dragonlance and Forgotten Realms novels; etc, so it's no surprise that Knightmare fit perfectly into my life.

Four adventurers (kids under sixteen) entered the Castle of Confusion in the hope of conquering its dungeon. One wore the Helmet of Justice, which limited what he/she could see, and entered the dungeon proper. The remaining three stayed behind to act as guides, able to see on a screen where their Dungeoneer friend was, to direct and attempt to keep them from falling into imaginary pits of doom and suchlike.

The rules of the game were overseen by a Dungeon Master named Treguard of Dunshelm (pictured right), a noble(ish) born Saxon knight, he would give occasional clues and hints to either encourage a train of thought, help solve a puzzle or feed the team's nervousness. Among Knightmare fans, Treguard rocks!

The Quentin Tarantino Collection (2011)

The Quentin Tarantino Collection (2011)

Number of discs: 6  |  Running Time: 625 minutes (combined)

I may get around to rewatching (or in some cases watching for the first time) QT's later films, or I may not, but until then have this, a collection of five features put out by Lions Gate Home Entertainment housed in a cheapo, flimsy cardboard box.

That's the actual box art on the right, with QT looking moody. Perhaps someone accused him of mass plagiarism prior to the photo being taken?

Every time I see it I wonder if it was a conscious decision not to have the cover art for the films in the order they were released or did someone screw up?

Of that order, the first two I'm very pleased to own, and if they weren't included I'd have bought them separately. The next one I'm mostly indifferent to. The final two I don't care for at all, even though I'm a fan of many of the things that inspired them.

Dennis Potter's Karaoke (1996)

Karaoke (1996)

Dir. Renny Rye | 4 episodes, approx 50 minutes each.

The first part of Potter’s final work was broadcast two years after his death. He wrote it with the full knowledge that he was dying, which makes viewing it a deeply poignant experience.

You might expect the situation to have pushed him towards tapping into the bleaker side of his talent, but there’s a huge amount of darkly wry humour in the script. There’s also a feeling that inevitability can’t be conquered, so it should instead be thoroughly mocked as best we can.

The main protagonist is a screenwriter named Daniel Feeld. Daniel, played with intensity by Albert Finney, is diagnosed with the same painful medical condition that killed Potter in real life, so it’s fair to assume that it’s at least partly autobiographical in nature. His most recent work is causing grief for both himself and the director of the TV adaptation (Richard E. Grant). It’s fiction but, as is already established, fiction often has a modicum of reality in it.

HAMMER: Dracula Films (1958-74)

Dracula (1958)

aka Horror of Dracula (in the US)

Dir. Terence Fisher

It took huge liberties with Bram Stoker's original story, but otherwise Hammer's first flirtation with the Dracula figure is the best vampire film they ever made.

The elaborate sets are beautifully lit. The creeping strings and timely crashing cymbals of James Bernard's score lift everything from routinely dramatic to legendary heights.

What gets the most attention, deservedly so, is the addition of Christopher Lee in the lead role and Peter Cushing as his nemesis, the pursuant Dr. Abraham Van Helsing. Pitting those two against each other is like having mountains collide amid a thunderstorm.

The ending is the most memorable of any vampire film I've ever seen.

Films based on works by R. E. Howard (1985—)

Red Sonja (1985)

Dir. Richard Fleischer

The She-Devil with a Sword was created by Roy Thomas for Marvel's Conan comic series, but she was based on Red Sonya of Rogatino, a Howard-created character that appeared in a short story titled The Shadow of the Vulture (1934).

Arnold Schwarzenegger co-stars as a tactless barbarian that isn't Conan. My guess is there was some kind of licensing issues behind the scenes, because it's one hell of a missed opportunity, or it would be if the Red Sonja film was better.

The addition of an irritating child character means the sexualised female warrior role is curtailed, but the homophobia remains. Typical.

I can't remember the last time I saw so many polystyrene rocks collected together in one place.