Hawk the Slayer: The Last of Her Kind (2025)

Hawk the Slayer: The Last of Her Kind (2025)

Author: Alec Worley | Illustrator: Simon Colby (line) / Gary Caldwell (col) | Page Count: 52

"She is like a child absorbed in her own cruel fantasy, forcing us to play along."

A continuation of Hawk's story set after Watch for Me in the Night (2023). The Last of Her Kind was serialised in 10 consecutive issues of the weekly 2000 AD magazine (#2413-22), for a total of just 52 pages. Rebellion might consider that enough page count for a proper TPB of its own, but it's considerably less than the previous story, so it seems unlikely that it'll get one - not unless there's a similarly-sized third part to add to it.

So I decided to feature it as is, with no official cover art - the pic to the right is Cliff Robinson's cover art of #2419 onto which I added a Hawk the Slayer logo. [1]

He-Man and the Masters of the Universe (1983-84)

He-Man and the MotU (1983-84)
Dirs. various | Seasons: 02 | Episodes: 130 (total), approx 23 mins each.

In theory, writing about the original MotU TV series should be a simple task because it isn't a difficult series to describe —  it's a mix of High Fantasy and Science Fiction, wrapped up in a 1980s bun — but the characters and their world have been such a defining part of my life that finding the words is proving to be difficult. It'll probably sound ridiculous, but if I could reach deep into my soul and paste that onto the page, much of what's there would be MotU-shaped.

Within the colourful blobs of joy would be identifiable forms. There'll be one that looks like a stone castle with a skull entrance. Next to it would be a jagged mountain with a giant snake wrapped around it. Elsewhere, you'd see a large cat the size of a lion, but green with orange stripes, and red armour on its back and head.

And there would be heroes, different in temperament but each one cut from the same cloth, standing together, poised to defend, strong in spirit and steadfast in purpose as they do their utmost to prevent the forces of evil from realising their selfish goals, lest the innocent suffer. A cliché it may be, but it's a cliché with a true heart, and that heart beats in time with my own. Put simply, I adore 1980s era MotU.

Hawk the Slayer: Watch for Me in the Night (2023)

Hawk the Slayer: Watch for Me in the Night (2023)

Author: Garth Ennis | Illustrator: Henry Flint | Page Count: 128

"Since last you rode those awful paths, the black woods have almost doubled in size..."

Forty-three years! That's how long it took for a sequel to Hawk the Slayer (1980) to emerge. That's quite a span.

The only downside is the continuation is a comic book, not a movie. Wait, that's not a downside. It's quite the opposite, in fact, given how shit-awful modern fantasy movies are. The comic has no CGI, no extended universe crap, and no woke politics. That's a bona fide upside!

Was it worth the wait? No, but it did inspire me to rewatch the movie, so, again, I'm calling it a good thing.

Its story, written by Garth Ennis, of Hellblazer and Preacher fame, feels like an 80s B-Movie, which is how it should feel, in reverence to its predecessor.

It follows Hawk as he reunites with the remaining members of the Table of Five. Together with a couple of newbies, they go to thwart a great evil.

.hack//4Koma (2010)

.hack//4Koma (2010)

Author: Koichi Sumimaru | Illustrator: Various |  Page Count: 192

"Your morals as a protagonist are being challenged, aren't they?"

A yonkoma, often shortened to 4koma, is a four-panel manga similar to the kind of thing you'd see in a Sunday newspaper, except that most yonkoma are read from top to bottom, not left to right horizontal.

The .hack yonkoma parodies Project .hack and .hack Conglomerate. The comedy is derived mostly from non-canon meetings, rivalries, awkward social situations, and typically friendly people being dicks to other characters. As such, in-jokes are definitely the order of the day, so if you're not very familiar with each person's usual demeanour, or the .hack world, in general, you'll miss most of the situational humour.

Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers (1988)

Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers (1988)

Dir. Fred Olen Ray

From the safety warning at the beginning to the very last cut, HCH is a lot of cheap fun.

What separates it from the bucket-load of 80s B-Movie crap is the addition of a private dick, unsubtly named Jack Chandler (Jay Richardson), who provides an occasionally clumsy but primarily enjoyable hard-boiled medium-boiled noir-esque v/o. His wit and male weaknesses make him a likeable loser.

The hookers play up to the scream-queen, comedy/horror stereotypes in a fully self-aware script. Despite the title, however, there's very few actual deaths by chainsaw, but having Gunnar Hansen oversee them adds an extra in-joke for fans of horror (although his passionless acting is far from memorable).

It's released in the UK as part of 88 Films' themed Slasher Classics Collection (it's #6), but it only marginally fits that description, I feel.

Lou Ferrigno: Hercules Films (1983-85)

Hercules (1983)

Dir. Luigi Cozzi

Lou Ferrigno is Zeus' chosen one, a hero of the people who's granted incredible strength.

In his quest to save his love, Cassiopea (Ingrid Anderson), from the evil King Minos (William Berger) the champion must overcome trials, battle mechanical titans (really) and face off against evil sorcery.

After an extended creation myth opening that's strangely reminiscent of Richard Donner's Superman (1978), the film goes all out to impress with its manly beards, shiny armour and sexy females. And even though its aspirations are much greater than its achievements, as a fan of 1980s special effects I enjoyed a significant amount of it.

The HAMMER Collection: Part 1 of 3 (1965-66)

The HAMMER Collection:
DVD Box Set - Part 1 of 3 (1965-66)

A twenty-one disc DVD box set containing some of the best and worst films that the legendary HAMMER studio made before it succumbed to financial trouble and was forced to put away the costumes and close its doors.

It's a tidy package that takes up very little space on a shelf. It's roughly about the size of a cube made from standard size CD jewel cases. The discs are housed securely in four multi-disc digi tray booklets. I dislike digi trays, usually, but they're better than crappy card wallets, which is what I feared the discs would be presented in.

I'm splitting the collection into three parts with seven films apiece and in chronological order.

That's not the order they're arranged in the box, but it means that the post for each of the three parts will be roughly equal in size (besides this one, which has a slightly longer intro). As for putting them in chronological order - it makes sense to me, more so than the unusual order they're presented in the actual box. Part 2 of the collection is HERE, while Part 3 is HERE.

The Hound of the Baskervilles (1959)

The Hound of the Baskervilles (1959)

Dir. Terence Fisher

Peter Cushing played the role of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's Sherlock Holmes many times on television but, alas, only once for HAMMER Studios. His ever-alert, energetic portrayal will surely annoy some folks but for me he’s the definitive film version.

So too is André Morell as Watson, a decent detective and a reliable friend, not the bumbling idiot of some other filmed versions.

It’s unmistakably HAMMER, the set-bound elegance is clear to see, and being adapted from a literary source as fine as their many horror works meant it was their equal in almost every way. The only downside is the depiction of the moor itself; it needed a more chilling, eerie mystery characterising it.

.hack//Legend of the Twilight: Manga Trilogy (2003)

.hack//Legend of the Twilight: Volume 01 (2003)

Author: Tatsuya Hamazaki | Illustrator: Rei Izumi | Page Count: 176

"I'd watch my back if I were you.
Your friend has returned."

A manga trilogy that forms a part of the Project .hack series, the first generation of the .hack universe. It's set chronologically after the first four games that appeared on the Playstation 2 console; i.e. Infection; Mutation; Outbreak; and Quarantine. (See HERE.)

If you're new to The World you'll lack the necessary background and will encounter minor spoilers of events that unfolded in the games. It's not necessary to have played them first, but it's recommended. The book makes some allowances for new fans, but space is limited, so the catch-up is necessarily brief.

If you've a working knowledge of what has gone before, then dive in. Otherwise, you might want to play the games first, if that's an option for you.

.hack//Liminality (2003)

.hack//Liminality (2003)

4 episodes of varying lengths (45 mins or 30 mins long; 132 minutes in total)

A small but significant number of players have fallen into a coma while playing a game, an MMORPG titled The World. While the bodies of the afflicted lie in a hospital bed their online avatars have gone mysteriously missing. A group of concerned Player Characters band together to find out if there's a connection and, if there is, how to reverse the process so that they can get their friends back.

.hack// is a huge franchise. I've played games, read novels and manga, watched multiple anime (series and films) and own soundtracks. Sometimes the works are standalone and sometimes they aren't. The .hack//Liminality OVA requires knowledge of the larger universe, specifically the first four PS2 games (info HERE) to understand its history fully; the events that occur in the games are happening concurrently with events in the real world, although the main characters in each aren't the same.

Hawk the Slayer (1980)

Hawk the Slayer (1980)

Dir. Terry Marcel

A cheesy Sword and Sorcery flick that I loved as a kid. I'd a recorded-off-TV VHS copy back in the day, but times have changed and I no longer have a VHS player, so I bought it on Blu-ray and treated my memories to a rewatch in 1080p.

It borrows plot from quite a few different sources, including Tolkien, the Western genre, and a well-known sci-fi film that I refuse to name (hint: it rhymes with bar wars).

John Terry is Hawk, a leading man with an impractically-balanced magic sword, but the script doesn't push him to the fore like you might expect. If you were to add up his screen time, it's probably not much more than some of the other heroes. He's too phlegmatic to be considered charismatic, so it's not much of a loss.

Hell Comes to Frogtown (1987)

Hell Comes to Frogtown (1987)

Dirs. Donald G. Jackson / R. J. Kizer

The 'Hell' of the title refers to Sam Hell, an independent man in a post-war world run by women. The war left the majority of the population sterile, but not Sam. He's not filled with blanks. Sam has the highest damn spermatozoa count on record! So he's tasked with seeking out fertile women and, calling upon his record-breaking potency, impregnating them... for his country, of course. Good work if you can get it. Except, it's not, because it means venturing into the dusty wasteland.

Roddy Piper does what Roddy Piper did best (other than rowdy wrestling, I guess), which is be the downtrodden hero in a world that's gone to shit. He may not have been a natural actor, but Roddy was a natural entertainer in his own unique way.

Hatchet Job: Love Movies, Hate Critics (2013)

Hatchet Job: Love Movies, Hate Critics (2013)

Author: Mark Kermode  |  Page Count: 272

'In a perfect world, film criticism would not be a series of rapid responses fixed for ever [...], but would rather be a slowly evolving debate in which nothing is certain and everything is up for grabs.'

I haven't read Mark Kermode's previous books yet, but nor was I unfamiliar with the London-born film critic, having seen him pop up on numerous film-related shows on British TV, most notably on the BBC 2 arts programme The Culture Show. His reviews were the main reason I programmed my VHS to record the show when I wasn't at home.

Kermode's views on film were the ones that most closely matched my own, and I began to believe that if he liked something, then there was a very good chance that I would too. It's a feeling that has lessened in recent years, but my respect for him and his role hasn't diminished in the slightest.

.hack//Infection //Mutation //Outbreak //Quarantine (2002-03)

.hack//Infection, etc. (2002-03)

Genre: RPG  |  Players: 1  |  Developer: CyberConnect2

To clarify the confusing titling, there are four games in the series, each telling part of a lengthy story and each with the .hack// prefix. The games in order are: Vol 01 .hack//Infection | Vol 02 .hack//Mutation | Vol 03 .hack//Outbreak | Vol 04 .hack//Quarantine.

They're a traditional JRPG but resemble an MMORPG that remains one hundred percent offline. The story goes something like this: a popular MMORPG known as The World has caused a small number of players to fall into a coma. The game's creators attempt to hush the situation, but the scandal still breaks.

Despite the danger, a young boy named Kite selflessly enters the game to help his friend Orca, one of the coma victims. Kite believes the answer to the mystery lies within The World itself. He's a hero but doesn't know it yet; it's up to you to guide him to his destiny.

H.R. Giger Tarot (2000)

H.R. Giger Tarot (2000)

aka: Baphomet: The Tarot of the Underworld

Author: Akron  |  Illustrator: H.R. Giger  |  Page Count: 223

It's the usual type of bundled Tarot package, which means it’s a book giving details of readings and spreads and a deck with which to use.

The individual cards are beautifully presented, large format but totally impractical for use; nor is it a full deck, it’s just the Major Arcana.

Worse, some of them have been changed. The Hanged Man is now The Hanged Woman, to better represent the painting Akron has chosen, and Temperance has become Alchemy.

It doesn't really matter because they weren't painted to commission; like I said, they were simply chosen, the paintings existed before the book was conceived and therefore lack the traditional imagery or symbolism that a serious practitioner of the art might prefer.

HAMMER: Frankenstein Films (1957-74)

The Curse of Frankenstein (1957)

Dir. Terence Fisher

TCoF was a trio of firsts for HAMMER Studios: their first horror in colour, their first Frankenstein film and the first of their productions to feature Christopher Lee.

The story is a confessional flashback, meaning the Baron's evolution from cultivating an infectious curiosity to succumbing to an isolating obsession is paced by his own telling, working inexorably toward the creature's reveal. Universal forbade the use of their existing iconic image, so HAMMER had to make their own more gruesome version, sans neck-bolts.

It's privilege that enables the Baron to carry out his work. Meddling in pure science at the level he does is the exclusive preserve of the rich. If he'd been impecunious the creature would probably never have been born.

Hardware (1990)

Hardware (1990)

Dir. Richard Stanley

Over the years and after repeated viewings I've grown to really love Hardware even though the things that are wrong with it are probably equal in number to the things that are right.

By that logic, it should be little more than an average movie, but Richard Stanley put so much of himself into the film that it's as if the inner-workings achieved a kind of semi-life of their own, making even the flaws interesting viewing.

From the mystery figure in the opening scene, shown walking through a post-apocalyptic wasteland, scavenging for whatever he can turn into profit in a decaying economy, through to the city, itself a different kind of wasteland, right to the very end credits it's a film that feels strangely familiar but simultaneously, mysteriously unreal.

Hellraiser Films: V-IX (2000-11)

Hellraiser: Inferno (2000)

Dir. Scott Derrickson

The first instalment in the straight-to-video continuation of the Hellraiser franchise raises a few questions. The most pertinent being why is this even a Hellraiser movie? Having Pinhead in your story for about three minutes in total doesn't make it a Hellraiser story. Putting him on the cover doesn't make it a Hellraiser movie. The same as how my wearing a Batman tee-shirt doesn't swell my bank balance and make me a target for shallow, gold-digging whores.

In truth, it feels like the beginnings of a TV Series; standalone stories that just happen to feature Lemarchand's box and a brief appearance or two from the lead Cenobite. A quick google after viewing confirmed suspicions: it was an existing horror script that had the nailed-one's role subsequently added.

Halloween: Films (1978-2002)

Halloween (1978)
Dir. John Carpenter

Halloween is more than just another cheap, independent slasher flick. It's a master class on how to create, pace and sustain tension when working with a limited budget.

The unease and sense of foreboding that permeates every crucial scene is in large part due to Carpenter's use of music. Like Hermann's score on Psycho (1960) it has a stabbing, piercing, onomatopoeic quality that keeps your nerves on a knife edge.

The faceless, unstoppable force that is Michael Myers taps into a very human, deep-rooted fear of what's hidden behind the mask we all wear, but Michael's inner evil is so powerful that even blankness can't hide it.

Hellraiser Films: I-IV (1987-96)

Hellraiser (1987)

Dir. Clive Barker

Barker's first feature-length film is an adaptation of his own novella, The Hellbound Heart (1986). It's without a doubt his finest work to date as a director, and introduced to film audiences one of the most iconic horror villains of all time, one who could easily share space with Jason Voorhees and Michael Myers on a horror podium.

There are a few minor changes in names and relationships. Frank is still Frank, with all his vices intact, but his brother Rory is renamed Larry. Kirsty, who was Larry's 'friend' in the text is made his daughter. (That makes Julia a kind of wicked step-mom, which is an amusing thought.)

The main story is almost identical to the novella, but with some extra content to make it fit a feature film length. The new additions don't add much to what was already in place, except for one notable instance: for a short time it improves upon the ending as written in the book, but then it doesn't and ultimately takes a one-way ticket to Stupid Town. Nevertheless, everything prior to that is as good today as it was back in 1987.